A Mothers day for My mom.

I am working on a mother's day gift for my mother. I know that I won't be able to do these songs as well as these people do them, and I think I always sound like there are marbles suck up my nose when I hear a recording but anyway. I know she would want me to sing them. she always thought I had a beautiful voice. I miss her so much right now. I couldn't even call my dad to tell him thank you for the wonderful flowers he sent that really made my day,


Anyway here are the songs I am working on singing. This first on is a song that never failed to be sang in the car when we went on vacations. even if it was only up logan canyon and took no more than an hour.



The second is the last thing I got from my mother for Mothers day. she gave me this Cd last year just about NOW when my Ky was blessed and they came for the blessing. I don't know if I will get through this for a while the last verse is a killer for me right now.




I have the first one done but I am not sure how to get it on here.

a temple trip

SO I went to the temple on Friday. I was really hoping to know what I was suppose to do next. Well I do feel now that this child that I lost was my son, I am also more than pretty sure I have more to come. That being said I was unable to know how many (though I hope not too many I don't think my brain can do much more) or when. I also had specific prayers and I know the words didn't come from me. Prayers that friends in pain would be led to the Dr's that would help them. Friends who were having some troubles making decisions, that there would be clarity to make those decisions clear. I am seeing at least some of those prayers happen all ready and I love that when you ask your HF that he takes the action necessary for what is needed. I continue to pray those prayers for those that need them and I will continue to make them specific as to help those that need. I found that in the temple I realized that I need to just worry about what I am doing to better our family and the rest will fall into place.

LOST

As in I have lost a baby. This is all I could think of at church today. about how true, and at the same time ironic that statement is. True because in a very really sense I lost something. I don't have anymore and I didn't purposely send it away. The irony came in the sense that I never REALLY had it. I mean how does one loose something they have never held in their hands or seen with their eyes. I only had him ( and yes i really feel this was my sweet son) in my heart. Funny how fast I could go from not really wanting to be preggers to fully looking forward to the little boy clothes at Christmas time ( buntings are so dang cute) and then having that seemingly ripped away. I can't put up lost posters there is nothing to find. People keep asking me what they can do for me. What can another do for a broken heart. There is a real hole there, thankfully I have my kids. They are a big help, most times without even knowing it. somewhat understand those that have chosen to fall in to depression and just let it consume them. Please don't worry about me. I am Ok as far as that goes, I promise. I have to much to do in this life to let that happen, but I do understand it.
anyway just some more blabber from the lost child.

Going Home

FOrgive me if this is a bit disjointed. I had these thoughts going north today and have to put them down before I forget them.

Like going back home

I am going on a trip that feeling like going home after being gone for a long time. Familiar sites and sounds come back,
As the miles pass behind.
Voices all but forgotten come flooding to my mind,
I find my self thinking fondly of things I left behind.
As I walk through the doors there are some slight differences,
But the feel is still the same.
Warm caring and peaceful, full of joy not pain.
Listening to wiser ones, and feeling their concern.
Hugs and touches of tenderness just when you need it most.
As I walk back through the doors, I vow it won't be long,
Before I return to this place, it feels like going home.


not real good I know but the words were there and I just had to get them out.